I got a LOT of therapy out of this catchy tune.
You see my ex led me to believe he was coming back to me at Christmastime 2011, after having been gone 9 months. He began instant messaging me from overseas where he was living with his new sweetie. He said that he’d seen that she was just like him and he didn’t care for it.
I’ll spare you the details, but to make a long story short, when it came down to buying him the ticket back to the US (he was supposedly destitute), he said he was worried about “his credibility” with her, and told me that “he just couldn’t do that to her” because “she was now attached” and that she would “cry, and ask why, and be very hurt”. Duh! He didn’t worry about when he did that to me.
That is when the light came on above my head and I realized that I was once again being played. My 18-year-old son was wise enough to call it right off the bat. He told me “Mom, he doesn’t love you and he is not even sorry. It’s just because he got your divorce papers and he saw his back door closing.” Well, out of the mouth of babes as they say. He was absolutely right.
Apparently, Dear Ex Hibby just wanted/needed another fix of narcissistic supply so he started communicating with me again. He simply wanted to make sure that I still loved him (stroke his ego). Either that or he wanted to get more enjoyment (also narcissistic supply) out of proving to himself that he “still had it” and that he could still hurt me.
It was at this point, that I slammed the door closed for good. I never once pined for him after that.
Take my advice, ladies (and gentlemen). Please DO NOT fall for this kind of condescending manipulation. Remember, it’s not what someone SAYS, it’s what they DO. What he said was that he still loved me more than her, but what he DID was choose to stay there.
Dear Ex Hubby used to say, “Dummy up! Don’t be so naive!”
Well, I got it this time … finally.